Oppositional Defiant Disorder: Handling Tantrums

Oppositional Defiant Disorder or ODD, as it is more commonly known, often occurs with other behavioral and mental health conditions, such as ADHD. In fact, it has been estimated that over 50% of the people suffering from ODD are also suffers of ADHD. There are plenty of other conditions which are more common in people suffering from ODD with the majority of these centering on pronounced learning difficulties.

ODD is normally first noticed when the child is in his or her grade school years. The symptoms, which vary in severity, include the child being irritated and annoyed by authority figures, which, in turn leads to him becoming uncooperative and generally defiant.

Experts suggest that ODD affects around 10% of children. A specialist will diagnose ODD when the child displays a persistent pattern of disobedience towards authority figures, such as parents and teachers.

Symptoms of ODD:

Diagnosing Oppositional Deficit Disorder is actually quite difficult. However, you can use the list of symptoms below as a starting point.

• Child is argumentative with adults
• Displays of defiance
• Child refuses to do anything when asked
• Child deliberately tries to upset people
• Persistent and prolonged tantrums
• Child blames other people for their own mistakes
• Child displays touchy, or irritable tendencies
• Child appears to often be angry
• Child talks in a hateful manner
  

Just because your child is acting up, it doesn’t necessarily mean that he has ODD. It’s perfectly normal for children to test their boundaries, especially at the ages of 2 to 3, and during the teenage years. Normally, this is nothing to worry about and your child will grow out of it eventually.

As a parent, you have an important job in your child’s upbringing. As such, you should be finding ways to overcome your child’s ODD.

There are a number of things that you can do to parent a child with ODD:

• Be positive
• When the child does something right praise them and reinforce what they have done. Whenever they do something for you be sure to let them know that you are grateful
• Get medical attention as early as possible.
  

If you are particularly concerned about your child, then you might want to take him to see your family doctor. If he is concerned that your child is presenting significant symptoms of the disorder, then he will refer you to a psychiatrist who is familiar with dealing with children with such behavioral problems. You should be aware that bringing up a child with ODD will be difficult, and it is important that your child gets support from other members of the family.

Moreover, as a parent, you have to show that you are in control. Although children with this condition have a lack of respect for authority figures, you must retain control.

You may want to try drawing up a ‘rules contract’ to help you. This is a technique whereby you write down what you expect to happen on paper. Sometimes this works because it makes it a more formal system, which the child may respond to as it is similar to the way they are often managed in schools.

This contract will also make children realize that they are responsible for what they do; every child needs to learn that there are consequences for their actions. Once the condition is diagnosed, at least you know the reason behind the errant behavior, you can also look into treatment options and therapy with your doctor’s advice.

Many parents do not have the necessary tools to deal with this condition. They will normally react when their child starts showing defiance by giving in, threatening, screaming or sometimes negotiating. This isn’t the ideal thing to do as, by doing so, you are showing your child that he can get what he wants by behaving in an unacceptable manner.

You no doubt know that your child needs structure. The problem is that it can be difficult to decide on the right type of structure. Regular parenting methods such as “time out” often don’t work with ODD children, as they will simply use the time to plot some sort of revenge!

You should talk over their problems when they have calmed down. Most importantly, don’t give into temptation and join in with the shouting. Rewards are the best way of dealing with the condition, but never offer false rewards that are just intended to make them feel better as this will have worse repercussions.

You should carefully pick your battles with your child, realize that you cannot possibly win every one. Make sure that you pick ones you can win, and then make sure that you do win them!

Resources:

ODD Child Behavior Help
Defiant Teen Help
ADHD Treatment
Parenting Information